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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23964691">Your Heart's Desire</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/bi_magic/pseuds/bi_magic'>bi_magic</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (TV 2018)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, i really...dont know like this is just a big bundle of sadness</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 16:23:04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,637</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23964691</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/bi_magic/pseuds/bi_magic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After the Pygmalion spell fails, Sabrina and Harvey try to figure it out.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Harvey Kinkle/Sabrina Spellman</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Your Heart's Desire</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i'm not 100% pleased with this but i'm really in love with them so i had to write them Something. i hope i'll be able to write something better for this ship in the future but,,, have this in the meantime lmao</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The scent of his sheets and the sight out his window are achingly familiar. Harvey’s room has always been humble, much like the boy himself. She has always loved them both.</p><p>He comes in a mere second after Sabrina has seated herself on his bed. She jumps up, mumbling apologies, and Harvey can’t help the small, tired smile that captures his lips. He offers her a glass of water while shaking his head as if to say ‘don’t worry about it’, gesturing for her to sit back down as he takes place on the chair near his desk. Almost unaware, he grabs one of his many pencils, toying with it between his fingers. A distraction and defense mechanism well known to anyone who knows him well enough. And she does.</p><p>“I’m sorry about what happened, Harvey” she says, in her usual soft, warm tone of voice. It’s clear she wants to support him, but Harvey fears that her presence here, now, might only make things worse.</p><p>He’s sure their failure had hurt her, too, but here she is, comforting him. She always does this. Lets herself, her feelings be forgotten. He doesn’t like it. Never has.</p><p>He stays quiet, thinking back on the day he’d had. That prince of hell or whoever he is barging in to take Sabrina away from them. Hell is big business, he gets that, but this guy doesn’t have to interfere when she’s out of hell, too. And then, him claiming he has a solution, and that solution, big surprise, failing. And on top of all that, the reason for the failure was, apparently, that he didn’t love Roz enough.</p><p>Thoughts buzz in his head like a nest of bees, and he grabs an open sketchbook and lets the pencil move almost blindly on the page, trying to calm himself and silence his mind.</p><p>He realizes, after a few moments, that she’s come silently to stand behind him, that her palm is ghosting just above his shoulder, wanting to comfort but not wanting to overstep. Knowing that there was another pair of eyes looking at his drawing now, he looks down... and oh, he doesn’t like what he sees at all.</p><p>The painting is of a sculpture, with a pair of arms hugging it from behind. The owner of the arms is nowhere to be seen, but the statue - the statue looks like Sabrina.</p><p>He turns his head to gaze at her, eyes narrowed. She’s still the subject he’s most familiar with, the subject easiest to draw; her small nose, soft lips, sharp jaw, proud eyes and ivory curls. He’s studied her so deeply in the past he doubts he’d ever forget.</p><p>Her brows are furrowed, mouth slightly open, concentrated on the art before them on the table. He almost wants to smile at the sight of that expression.</p><p>They stay right there, completely silent, trying, together, to understand. There’s something nearly calming about the fact that even Sabrina doesn’t have all the answers; that he isn’t the stupid mortal boy trailing behind her, isn’t the lamb walking to slaughter, unaware.</p><p>Finally, they’re equals. They’re in this together.</p><p>Harvey doesn’t know what to think. Caliban had said before that his truest desire must be something or someone else, not Roz. And here he is, drawing Sabrina without even noticing. Could it be her? He doesn’t want to think that, doesn’t want to imagine the collective chaos and heartbreak it would bring upon everyone involved. But what else can it be? If he doesn’t truly love Roz, then who does he love? He has never loved anyone other than the two of them. There aren’t that many options to go around.</p><p>And on top of all that, Roz is still stoned in his garage, because of him. Because he, apparently, doesn’t love her enough to save her.</p><p>Everything swirls in his head, and he just wants to shake all the thoughts out, but he can’t. He can’t. Instead, he just shuts his eyes and presses his palms to his closed eyelids, in an attempt to rid himself of, or at least delay, the headache he knows is coming.</p><p>Sabrina stares at him all this time, gaze shifting between what she can see of him and the sketch he’d drawn of her. He’s always known to capture everything about her that is beautiful - and what isn’t beautiful, he would make so. (But maybe that is the point of him being an artist. Or maybe that’s just how he sees her.)</p><p>The silence stretches on for far, far too long, so long that it starts to ache in her chest like shattered glass, and she just can’t take it anymore. Her ribcage feels too tight for her own heart, like it might swell so much that it bursts and tears her into pieces from the inside out. The room seems to vibrate with expectation, waiting patiently for one of them to break the too-thick quiet. She hates awkward, heavy silences, especially between the two of them - they’ve had enough awkward silences to last a lifetime by now. She doesn’t want that to happen to them again.</p><p>“Do you think I was the reason?” She asks, finally, in a small voice. She knows this might now be the right moment to ask, but when will it ever be? She hates herself for this - Roz is not so far away but she’s still stoned and she can’t possibly hear them and she wouldn’t need to know this conversation ever took place and dear Satan, Sabrina just needs answers.</p><p>Harvey’s head snaps upwards and his eyes meet hers. She’s never seen eyes as kind as his, as honest, as soft. Even if she’s much more powerful than him, much more capable considering their circumstances, he always makes her want to curl into his chest and hide away with him protecting her. She definitely trusts him that much. She definitely loves him that much.</p><p>After another too-long silence, Harvey sighs, rubs his forehead. “I don’t know, Brina,” his voice is even more quiet than hers, more vulnerable, more scared. He keeps quiet for a while more, breathing deeply, desperation and confusion coming off him in waves. “What else could it be?”</p><p>When he eventually speaks Sabrina’s breath catches, and her heart almost entirely stops. She turns around and leans against his desk, almost sitting on it but not quite, so that she has a better view of his face. He finally moves his hands away and meets her gaze again.</p><p>They stare at each other for a while, breathless and soft. Sabrina wants to kiss him but she can’t, shouldn’t, wouldn’t. Instead she moves her hand ever slightly across the table, until her fingers are just lightly touching his.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” her voice is barely above a whisper, and her other hand comes to trace delicate fingers across his cheek, jaw, neck. He leans into the touch, most likely unconsciously. A painful lump sits in her throat.</p><p>Harvey turns his head slightly, so that his lips touch her palm. It’s not a kiss, but it might be close. Too close, so much that her lungs feel like someone’s squeezed them of air. His voice is soft and sad, mouth moving against her hand, when he says, “It’s not your fault.”</p><p>She can’t help but lean closer, bring both hands to cup the sides of his neck. She can’t watch him or listen to him like this, all broken and disappointed. She never could - that’s what had created the whole mess between them in the first place.</p><p>They’re way too close, now, foreheads just barely touching, breaths mingling, hot and heavy. Sabrina thinks she should pull away, but she can’t bring herself to. She’s had to pull away from him too many times, and it’s always heart-wrenching. He never makes it easy for her. Not with his lips parted like that, with his eyes fluttering shut, with that soft, beautiful expression that so openly says <i>you can have anything you want</i>.</p><p>Eventually, Harvey is the one to pull away - Sabrina can’t do it, can’t bring herself to be the one to put distance between them again - with a sigh on his lips. “What am I supposed to do?” His voice breaks slightly, and she just wants to hold him tight, to promise him that everything will be okay. Except she knows that will only make it worse.</p><p>She hesitates for a moment, but the truth lies deep within her; she’s the last thing he needs right now. He’s better off without the temptation, without the lingering desire between them, without the constant reminder that Roz isn’t healed and it’s because of him. “It isn’t your fault either, Harvey,” she whispers, touches his cheekbone for just a single second before her hand falls down to rest on her own knee. “I’ll... get out of your way.” The words slip and he looks up at her, wide eyed and pained. She closes her eyes.</p><p>A squeeze to his hand, one last, fleeting glance to the sketch of her sitting on the desk, and she’s gone, the only sign of her ever being there is the gust of wind, moving the curtains.</p><p>Harvey feels her presence still, all around him, his mouth half open to ask her to stay. He buries his head in his hands and remembers Roz, still caged in stone downstairs.</p><p>He rips the drawing of Sabrina from his book and throws it in the trash, tries not to feel the ghost of her touch on his face, in his hair. Tries not to remember every kiss they’ve shared in this room. He looks up to where she’d been just a moment ago, a mixture of want and guilt filling him up, brimming in him.</p><p>Maybe it’s better this way.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i mean?? like i said, i'm not completely pleased, but i hope you guys enjoyed it! please leave kudos or a comment if you did! thanks for reading &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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